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Today I had the best work lunch experience I believe I have ever had. This includes my birthday work lunch last year at a mexican restaurant in which I ingested about 3 shots worth of tequila, poured directly from the bottle into my mouth. In front of multiple coworkers. At noon. While that experience did make my afternoon much more pleasant, my lunch today surpassed it. This meant a light lunch and lots of people. This also meant I was very excited when said coworker had to cancel.

It features your usual wraps and burgers and fries. Originally I had no idea how I was expected to eat there over 5 times to use up the card, but then it dawned on me. There is a lunch filet. And I love a lunch filet. I think in a previous life I was a T-Rex of some sort. I have no upper body strength and it reduces me to internal tears to see a hunk of meat grilled within an inch of its life.

The closer I can get to mimicking a lioness taking that first fresh muscle-ripping bite of deerflesh, the happier I am. Blood and all. The combination of the absence of people and the prospect of steak got me through the morning. Or maybe Blood of the Dragon is more appropriate hereā€¦. It came with a side of broccolini. I had never even heard of this before, because I try and avoid green things as they are generally not fit for human consumption.

Broccoli being an exception, I decided to risk this one. It was slathered in garlic butter and therefore delicious. I also got a diet coke instead of water, because it was epic lunch day. And diet coke is refreshing. I read and ate for 45 glorious minutes. The wait staff attempted to take my plate prematurely no less than 3 times before I polished off every last edible element on it, like I knew I would.

I walked down Beale Street and smiled at the Duke Silver vibes eminating from the different blues joints I passed. I had planned to buy my usual 90cal skinny vanilla latte, but today was not a day for skinny.

Because there were too many people on Beale, I happily took a deserted alley to avoid walking back down it again. I met a stray dog on the way and made friends. Because animals love me.


Flick Fact: Where did actor Nick Offerman get his start in Central Illinois?

Only idiots recommend that. Torso: Should be thick and impenetrable. O: Cultivating a manly musk puts your opponents on notice. Skim milk: Avoid it.



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